S P L I N T E R S

like a broken toy

i carry with me

the remains of what use to be

a simple joy

faith that the heart nursed

absurdly sweet

buffoonish

the wind tossed me brutally and rigorously

unmasking the crudeness

the materiality

i stand alone

with barren hands gaping wide

 dreams

slipping away

one by one

bewlidered now

lost in a fog

frosted and grey

and as glum as it could be

sullenly cold

a funeral of defunct memories

burried under heaps

of mendacious and feigned zeal

sham nous

sham bonds

sham all

E u p h e m i s m

 

don't read too much,

into my plainspoken expression,

I often misqquote myself,

underrate my cognitive process,

verbalize sharp wordedly,

articulating unseasonably,

of what is left,

in an interrupted,

lamentable excuse for a conversation,

never bridging the void,

intensifying futile endeavours,

of reaching out,

attaining delusive outcome,

where the anima merges,

into obscurity ,

only breaking away all the more,

from actuality,

conformity,

veracity.

Money woes

These days when a couple goes for the eternal knot , the financial crisis turns into a marital crisis and then comes the conflict,arguments and blame games.The quixotic tales of the past , where everything ended with a "happily ever after" scenario are a bit hard to assimilate in modern times.When the battle of the nerves continue  to make ends meet , there is hardly any time left for the survival of such notions. The huge finances that gobble us down and cringe our existence make it impossible for the knight in shining armour to afford his armour.It did not cost a darn cent in the past to make children fall in love with the concept, where everything would eventually fall into place and poor little desolute damsel would be swept off her feet by a handsome prince .

There is always light at the end of the tunnel , except for the fact that light is a train and you're standing on the tracks,.it is more like  you know you're falling and no one calls 911 or worst . If one of the partners is the bread earner it could easily end up into self pity for the other , the incessant bludgeon of not doing enough compared to their spouse causes bitterness.The adaptations made to re-shape the lifestyles accordingly  eats away all the charm that is left to the dreamy bubble, reality hits hard and blows out all the affection.For better or for worse vows tilt the equilibrium to worse side and sharing the worse becomes a challenge. It does not merely stops at being a problem related to earning enough dough and no sinlge plan can workout for such marriages . It requires numerous modifications and compromises since there are no bailouts and no fairy god mothers .

Erasing debts and mopping out the economic dust that accumulates under the carpet of life is not an easy procedure and calls for resilience and patience.Till then it is safe to stop aiming for objectives that are out of reach and focalize the  priorities.Enjoy the simple pleasures of life becuase the rosy glow of pre-marriage romance may not be there.Talking things out on a regular basis and dishing out concerns honestly, is one way of getting the load of the chest .Sinking down under the weight of financial woes could be an easy escape but to stay afloat one needs courage and endurance.